Flipping, running, twisting, giggling, hiding and seeking, among the rose bushes, heavy with rain and soft with the season. The girl peers through the thorns and the boy runs through the green grass maze. Wet knees, muddy boots, I look from my bench dedicated to Kate. watching these to Angels for hours and hours. Never bored of their playfulness.
This weekend I was much in thought. I’m not afraid to say that my mind was black. Sometimes the clouds dispersed and I saw a glimpse of my colours. I thought how can I share this with you so I put together this drawing. Each one of us has colours, I’m only talking hypothetically… I am saying we have true colours that are FOREVER there. But on some days, that can last weeks, we tend to see the black. When there is no real reason or rhythm. I discovered that I am notorious in self sabotaging. there are moments where I am too afraid to show my true colours, be it because of a need of acceptance or simple shyness or being afraid of change. My colours where hiding behind the black. I thought what could help me to move forward.To disperse the heavy skies. Do I sit in it and let it feed of my incapability of movement. Or do I fight it. What are we told to do? What should we do? I became angry with myself. How dare I be black when I have what I have. Around I go in a circle. To many self-help books, people and do’s and don’ts. Our blackness is confused. The rain comes and the smell of clarity tip toes around me. And I KNOW that the rain will stop and the skies will clear and when I see my true colours again I realise I have something new with me. An Understanding.
That gets me through.
in a moment I see reeds, long and lean, moving with the water tunes.
in a moment I see feathers, stretching far out to sea.
in a moment I see snow.
cool with her touch and light in her voice.
She has pale skin and vivid eyes,
her hand upon mine, I melt in her embrace.
a little owl is perched on her shoulder and she feeds it berries of red.
in a moment I am struck
credits: dribble.com, earthyminds.tumblr, Ann Johnson Design, inspired design, Simen Johan, poppytalk.blogspot
night-time. and the boy stirs, ‘I can’t get to sleep’ he tells a sleeping woman. who has already woken more than once this night. a man lies beside her blowing air through closed lips. the Dog baths at midnight. The woman congratulates the girl who sleeps in a warm cocoon, not a sound not a peek. ‘neither can I son’ she huffs to the darken room.
As some of you may know I have undertaken another project called The Jam Jar Magazine, an online creative lifestyle magazine about people who live and breathe creative projects. My magazine showcases some wonderful handmade items and conversation between The Jam Jar and craftsmen/women. As I take this journey in finding the most amazing things done by hand I find and meet some amazing people. My thrill is putting together a bouquet of inspiration, creativity and determination. Determination in the success of ones idea. The 3rd issue is due to release soon and I can’t wait to see how it goes.. It is still young and as all young things takes a bit of time to grow up and become a balanced project. I trust in myself that this will become a rewarding project and a place to gather and enjoy what people are doing here in New Zealand. I would love your support, so go and check it out. You won’t regret it. I promise. X
When growing up, my Mother didn’t celebrate Mother’s Day, like many families out there. her argument was why have only one day in the year to be nice for your Mum. lovely that, but we do tend to get distracted with life. others don’t do it for the commercial reason. I on the other hand think. Mother’s Day Yipee!! My children make cards and breakfast for me, (this doesn’t happen every day). my Husband bonds with them while toasting the croissants and brewing the coffee. we go out hand in hand to the beach or the forest. we make more of an effort to dress the dinner table and its more of a balanced effort. I think it teaches the children to give, to appreciate what a person does and rewards them with extra love and TLC.
and I give my Mother extra love and TLC to her. coming together to appreciate the heart of the family. what she naturally deserves. Don’t you think?
Would Love to know know how you spent your Mother’s Day, Drop a line. x
side note: The Dog, Luky. beach was Rapaki in the Lyttelton Harbour, Napkins from allgood interiors.